Who Do You Think YOU Are?
Is a critique tearing your relationship apart? Are you afraid one will and are running out of excuses? Are you simmering over a critique someone you know gave you? A realistic look into the severity of suggestion.
Get Real!
This is the first and foremost action to take regarding critiques: be realistic. No matter what your personal opinions are of critiquing and reviewing, it exists and is very common in the virtual world.
Unfortunately, this needed and seemingly constructive process has it’s darker side. Hurt feelings, anger, resentment litter the path and await anyone who chooses them. An unknowing reviewer can find themselves targeted by someone just because they didn’t claim to be breathless by the author’s talent. It isn’t a problem online, but if it’s someone you know personally, the circumstances can quickly change. A reviewer has to be very careful about who they decide to help.
"A reviewer is not flaunting their superiority or arrogance. They are doing what they’re supposed to do, as a friend or an online peer: they find errors."
This has to be the most ridiculous and ludicrous reason for a relationship to end. When a friendship or a relationship is ripped apart because some suggested something that the author didn’t like, someone has serious issues to deal with. If you find yourself a target of someone else because you gave them a bad review, leave the situation.
A critique is nothing more than a series of suggestions. Common sense will define what it should be for you. There is a massive difference between a personal attack and a simple review, if you can’t separate the two, you should not go into professional writing. Nor should you ask friends to review because someone, at some point, might tell you there is an error somewhere.
It is amazing that in an industry so competitive and relentless, some writers still live in a dream world. Inside this mystical realm, an entire industry hinges on nothing more than creativity and art. There are no board meetings or editorial reviews, no "business," interests at all. Publishers have a great financial pool that they all survive on regardless of sales. There is no need for promotion or mention of target audience. The concept of editing seems like a nightmare that only the brave, or the stupid, put themselves through. That editors aren’t the least bit finicky and grab everything that crosses their desk. This magical place is a myth. It is fiction and fantasy.
"A reviewer is not supposed to inflate your ego or satisfy your insecurities. They are to point out your weaknesses and make suggestions on how to improve or cover them. They help you with what you may overlook. It is a favor to you, whether you want to realize it or not." If you think a good friend or close acquaintance gives you a brutal review, what makes it so terrible? Did they use profanity? Did they personally tell you that you are brainless or just stupid? Do you really think if someone wants to insult you, they will just tell you something is misspelled? Be realistic. Do not bring in implication or subtly, put your creativity to use with logic. If you want to insult someone, will you tell them their work is good, but you feel it could be better if this were changed? Absolutely not.
What about someone who doesn’t know you? Someone who isn’t really concerned with how you, "feel," because they have a business to run and responsibilities that extend far beyond the emotions of new writers?
It is amazing that so many writers are so "insulted" by others who try to help them. What is one tiny blow to the ego seems to deflate the entire sense of self-worth. Instead of thanking someone for taking the time to help them or at least suggest something productive, they choose to sulk and wage some vendetta against the reviewer.
Writing is not a destination, it’s a long path. It will be even longer and unpleasant if you choose to burn every bridge that doesn’t lead you exactly where you want to go as soon as you want to.
Critiquing is suggestion, plain and simple. No writer is bound or obliged to follow every word. The big hurdle for many is to implement the suggestion and see if it really works. Somehow, just the idea of implementing is an arduous task. What if the person reviewing your work is right? That’s a consideration hot-headed writers seldom use.
These same writers would be absolutely delighted and amazed to see the results of actually listening to a constructive, supportive review.
Calm Down!
Editors and those who critique alike are simply, "mid-wives." Few new writers see it this way. The author conceives the idea, or "child," carries it to term by writing and self-editing. The editors and reviewers assist in the birth of a new and shining work of literature. This "birthing" procedure is not meant to be painless or quick and easy. That’s the entire process in a nutshell.
Do you really believe the person trying to intimidate you? Or are they simply bringing your out of your comfort zone? It’s easy for a writer to "settle," to lay dormant in a self-imposed state where the world is ignorant and the author is the brilliant one. Where no one knows or understands, their creativity is so great. This comfort zone is a place you will remain forever if you don’t concentrate on improving. Think of that. The way you write today, you will generally write the same in ten years. Twenty years. In thirty years, your status will not differ greatly than where you are now.
It is NOT a series of ulterior insults to hurt you. You should not react harshly or dramatically to someone offering simple suggestion. No, there is no underhanded motive or mission to obliterate your confidence. No, it is not a series of soft insults by someone who is, "jealous."
The reader is NOT parading their arrogance around or showing some great superiority complex you never noticed before. Anyone who reads often can spot a lack of rhythm. Period. The reviewer is simply reading your work. Isn’t that what you’re writing for in the first place?
Conclusion:
Even mega-authors’ books still go through editorial departments at publishers. People who have routinely sold millions and millions of books still have their work inspected and reviewed by a panel of professionals. Do you honestly think you don’t need any help at all? Will you still feel insulted by professionals at a publisher if they spotted errors? Why not thank the person trying to help you? They may’ve caught errors that would have gotten you automatically rejected by a publisher.
Before you get angry about it, get real about it.
©2005, Laurawrites.net. All rights reserved. The work or any part thereof may not be copied, transmitted, or used in any other form or medium.